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Thursday, May 3, 2012

Inside the Adoptee Blogsphere

Two situations are making the rounds on various blogs.  Both are enough to drive me insane because they diminish both the adoptee and the mother. 

Recently the JCICS presented a conference on adoption issues.  Fellow adoptee bloggers, Land of Gazillion Adoptees, attended this conference.  One of the worse offenders was Nancy Fox.  She grabbed the adoptee blogger by the chin and proceeded to preach to him about the new Korean adoption legislation affecting her supply of children from that country.  She says it will be to the detriment of children.  I can not say with any confidence that if she grabbed my chin like that I wouldn't respond with a fist in her face.  That is simple assault plan and simple. 

Of course Ms Fox is an owner/CEO of an adoption agency, AIAA.  Her agency placed Jennifer Haynes with an pedophile.  Her adopters and the agency did not complete her paperwork.  She was deported back to India as a result.  Ironically Ms. Fox blames all adopters for not following through with paperwork for their child.  Interestingly, this woman is on the board of the JCICS which makes one wonder about this organization and the level of corruption.

The second situation is Dan Rather's report, Abducted or Adopted.  I was not able to watch it since it is not part of my cable package.  From what I have read of reviews, he did touch the tip of the iceberg of what happened during the Baby Scoop Era.  Of course there was a reunion on the show.  Why is it that our media can't present a news article on adoption without a reunion?  Why can't we present an article based on the facts of adoption and what it has done to adoptees and their families?  Why does it always have to have a positive spin on it?  The negatives in adoption need to come forth.  The rest of society needs to see what it is like for an adoptee and his/her family in this country to search.  The rest of society needs to realize this.

The sick part of the reports are the claims that adoption is still good and those practices don't happen any more.  Yea right!  The report did not encompass all of the agencies that still to this day force men and women to relinquish their children.  The LDS Adoption Agencies are one such example.

Catholic Charities gave this letter of rebuttal.  They don't want to lose their product and their producers. How do you know that these natural mothers would not have loved their children if given the appropriate support and resources to succeed in their parenting.

“We must not lose track of the tens of thousands of adoptive parents who will be forever grateful to birth parents for the sacrifices they make to ensure that their children’s lives will be filled with the love and opportunity they may otherwise not have received.”

The Crittendon Homes are now blaming individual maternity homes instead of taking responsibility of the actions done in their names.

TNCF and the Crittenton agencies that are still in operation today are aware of, saddened by, and regret the experience of mothers “forced or coerced” into placing their children in adoptive homes and the impact on their children many of whom continue to search for their birth parents. These practices were not required, supported or endorsed by any National Crittenton directive and as independent agencies or homeseach had the ability to determine its own priorities and operating policies.
The Salvation Army's rebuttal blames the mother's families.  Yes they do play a role but the Salvation Army enforced these coercive adoptions.

These homes were operational during a time when significant social pressures were placed upon pregnant, unmarried girls, and a majority of the young girls came to the homes after being guided by their own families.

Even the National Association of Social Workers commented too.  All of these groups are protecting themselves and blaming everyone else but themselves.  It bugs me that no one wants to take responsibility of these coercive and forceful tactics.  All of these organizations state that this doesn't happen.  One just has to read the NCFA website to see that yes it still does.  This organization states in order for a woman to be redeemed that she must relinquish her child.  They in turn back stab her when she wants to parent.  They call her a slut, whore and other nasty words in order to get her to disappear.  The agencies involved are often relentless in their pursuit of the "product."  

This is why I hate even venturing into adoption reform again.  Nothing ever changes. 

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